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:: tipah tertipu bang,,..,~ ::


"mat, mat, peha tu.,.,~" Ted bersuara kepada aku sambil die membonceng motor ku utk ke pasar mlm BTR.

"mane2....?" kate aku ngan ghairah nye.,,.

"LC sebelah tu, balak ngan awek die..~"

aku cube memandang ngan mate yg terjojol seperti bola keranjang.,.,,.

"mong0k,.,.,.peha jantan tu nk watpe, aku tumbuk kang.,.,~" aku xpuas hati,.,.~

"hahahahaha,..," Ted gelak cam ifrit,..,


adakah Ted,........................................? ,..,.,teng teng teng..,.,~

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:: panas dan hanget,..,~ ::



rangkuman panas kala ini.,.,.,~

1. krisis MB perak.,.,.,
2 .influenza A H1N1 @ selsema siput babi
3. pilihan raya penanti.,.,
4. matinye ketua LTTE Velupillai Pirabaharan
4. barcelona vs MU,.,. keropok la barca nnt,..,~
5. AF dah abes.,,.,.gi mampos.,,.~
6. momok Tomok mng selion@1m

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:: jumaat mendatang,.,.~ ::


akhir nye sampai la giliran aku utk wat presentation,.,.., tahun nih big boss mewajibkan sume staff nye wat presentation, utk asah skill komunikasi kate nye,. so, aku pilih tajuk panduan pembelian komputer yg sesuai utk anda,,.,. nk wat topik memasak, segan plak,..,. hmm, dlm otak aku, satu je aku pikirkan, ape aku nk tipu budak² engineer nih,.,.ngeee~

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:: cerita pagi lagi,.,.~ ::


arini (eh, ke smlm..?) aku gi keje lewat sket,.,,. badan aku sengal semacam je, so aku bgtau manager yg aku masuk lewat,.,. pas mandi, wakfir manje2 suh aku antar die gi keje.., so, kwn nye pasal, aku pon antar la die skali,, sambil2 tu aku sarapan dlu kt mamak sebelah cc die keje tu,.~

"ya abang maw mkn apa..?" smbl menunjuk kan set "value meal" utk sarapan pagi.,..,eceh, cam mcD la plak,.,.,.

set value mealnye adelah, telur 1/2 masak 2 biji, satu set roti bakar berserta segelas teh tarik..sume nye beharga rm3.60 rm2.50,.,.,.sah dari pkl 7.00pg - 11pg,.,. kan aku dah kate, macam mcD siyakkkkkkkk,.,.,.~ murah ke,..? ntah la,.,.

"xpe la ane, bg teh tarik ngan maggi goreng pedas ae.,.,,..," jwb aku spontan,.,.ape kejadah mkn maggi goreng pagi2 nih,.,.x berkhasiat langsung,,.~

"pidas aar...~" ane tu mengajuk aku,,..,

"ye pedas".,.ulang aku,.,.~

smbil2 tggu,.,.aku check2 nset kot ade msg lupe nk reply smlm,.,.~

"ok abg siap,.,.,.,."

"tq arrr,.,..,"

smbl2 menjamah sarapan pagi tu, aku tgk siaran tv yg ditayang kan secara sambil lewa,..,~
sampai lah abes sarapan aku,.,.alhamdulillah, dpt lagi aku makan arini,.,.~ kemudian selepas mmbersihkan mulut ngan tisu, aku melihat kembali rancangan tv tu dengan lebih FOKUS,.

pergghhhhh, baru aku prasan, aku layan Saseme Street rupenye,.,.,. kejadah nye mamak nih pasang saseme street pepagi nih.,,. ingat tadika kemas agak nye,.,.~ pagi itu sungguh indah,.., bayar sume bill mkn, start motor, aku meneruskan perjalan ke tempat keje,.,. aku tersenyum sendirian diatas motor mengenangkan peristiwa itu,..,.,~




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:: jika itu buat ko riang 2,.,.~ ::


hotfm crew
: trafik dilaporkan sesak di lebuhraya NPE bla bla bla,.,.,.,.~

aku : ahhh sia***lah, jem plak NPE, abes la lewat nnt,.,.

wakfir : ko naek moto!!!!!!!!

aku : ahhhh, ko ngan Ted same je.,.,xde belas kasihan kt member langsung.,.,~

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:: tiada lagi tenang,..,~ ::


meowwwwwwww,..,.,.,.,
meowwwwwwwwww.,,..,~
meowwwwwwww,.,..,,.~

"nih lah keje nye.,.,.,tgh mlm memekakkkkk je kucen2 nih,..,.,xde laen gaduh berebut betina la tu,..,~"

meowwwwwwwwwwwwwww.,.,~
meowwww.,,,,,,,,,~
meowwwwwwwwwwwww.,.,.,~

"Ya Allah, aku satey kan jugak seko2 kucen nih kan" <-----terdengar sore Ted mengomel diluar,.,.~!

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:: kuasa pilihan.,.,~ ::


www.tagged.com

connecting, waiting, transfering,..,bla bla bla,.,.,~

2 friends request

"eh, ade org add aku la.,,.supermodel mne plak add nih",..,,.~

klik klik.,,,.

"huh.,.,sape2 je la 2 org nih,..,~"

"muka cam pokemon ade ati nk add aku.,.,.,reject!!!.,.,"

"hahahahahahahahahahaha.,,..,"

salah kah aku memilih....? ngeeee.,.,~

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:: pe lagi ted,..,~ ::


ted [1.30 pm] : weh jum mkn,..,.,,~

aku [1.30 pm] : aku da mkn la pagi td,.,.,~

ted [1.30 pm] : tu sarapan,..,.,

aku [1.30 pm] : nnt arr aku mndi dlu,.,..,~

smbl aku berlalu ke bilik tidur utk menyiap kan artikel "r u ok ted..?"

aku [2.02 pm] : ted jum mkn,,.. :D kate ku mengacah.,.,~

ted [2.02 pm] : aku tumb0k mati kang,.,,.,.~ <---sambil khusuk men0nton rancangan kegemaran nye Top Gear..

ted tak pernah terlepas menyaksikan rancangan kegemaran nye itu setiap minggu.,.,,.ngee~

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:: r u ok ted...? ::


ikh ikh ikh,,.,..,ted membuat bunyi ghairah sambil menggesel gesel kan badannye yg gem0k berisi pada pintu bilik aku.,.,.,.~

aku merenung nye tajam.,.,.,~

"boring2 nih berak best gak,.,.~" ujar ted smbl mengusha aku,.,.~

"ko bodo ae...? " ujar aku pula..

ted berlalu ke arah bilik air.,.,.,.,~

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:: pagi yang hmm.,.~ ::


krik krik krik.,,.oloh, xde air ke plak..? ke da kne potong..?

klakk, pa ka ka ka, bunyi pintu grill umah aku dibuka,..,.,~

"adek, xde air ka...?" sapa mesra jiran depan umah aku,.,.,.~

"hmm, xde kot auntie, mggu ni da 2 kali da " jawab aku ngan muka laksana ifrit mang0n td0o,.,.~

adesss kne mandi kt surau lgi arr nmpak nye,.,.., erk.,,,.baru aku perasan, selama 3 thn aku ddk sini, baru 1st time aku tegur die, selalu senyum2 je ,.., hehe,.,.,.harmoni sungguh kami hidup di sini,..,.,~

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:: originaliti uncle sam,..,~ ::




:: betapa sebenarnye kite "tggl di amerika" ::

Amerika (English Version)
by Rammstein

We're all living in Amerika,
Amerika is wonderful,
We're all living in Amerika,
Amerika, Amerika.

Do you want me?(No, I don't)
Do you need me? (No, I don't)
Dance with me while I'm leading? (No, I can't)
Will you love me? (No, I won't)
This is not a love song. (No, its not)
I don't sing my mothers tongue. (No, I don't)
Africa for Santa Claus.
and near Paris stands Mickey Mouse.

We're all living in Amerika...

We're all living in Amerika,
America is wonderful,
We're all living in Amerika,
Amerika, Amerika

Will you do it? (No, I won't)
Should you do it? (No, I don't)
Could you do it? (No, I can't)
Will you please me? (No, I won't)
If you don't want me... (You'll get hurt)
If you don't need me... (You'll get hurt)
If you don't love me... (You'll get hurt)
Fuck you is the magic word.

We're all living in Amerika,
Amerika is wonderful,
We're all living in Amerika,
Amerika, Amerika

We're all living in Amerika,
Coca-Cola, wonderbra,
We're all living in Amerika,
Amerika, Amerika.

This is not a love song,
No, this is not a love song.
This is how we do it, you'll get hurt
Fuck you is the sweetest word.

We're all living in Amerika,
Amerika is wonderful,
We're all living in Amerika,
Amerika, Amerika.

We're all living in Amerika,
Coca-Cola, sometimes war.
We're all living in Amerika,
Amerika, Amerika.

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:: owh bulan 2,.,.~ ::


:: minggu period se"malaysia"..? ::

seperti biase,, makhluk khinjir menjadi objek utama bahan tujuan cacian,.,.~ "klik gambar utk besarkan,.,.~

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:: owh bulan,.,.~ ::


:: period apa...? ::

"klik gambar utk besar kan,.,.~

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:: abe weiiii,.,.~ ::


:: sarapan hari ini ::


8.30am : hmm,,.awl lagi nih, sempat bli brkfst kt gerai kelantan tu,.,.~

"yo abe, nok ape...",.~

"bagi saye nasi kerabu satu, ngan daging bakar ae,.,."

"ok,.,.,.,.nah"

"berape kak...?"

"2 ghiya,.,.."

"erk,.,.,.,."  ......(ah sudah, mana aku nk cari money changer pagi² nih,.~)

"nape abe...? "

"errrr.,.klu pakai ringgit bley x...? :D..."

"abe abe...katuk ngan senduk nih tau la,.,.,."

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:: sedapnye.,.,~ ::



mende-alah nih mmg best.,,..,lagi2 kerup kerap kerup kerap time maen mapiawor,,.,.~ tapi kan, tgk2 blk.,,. mende-alah nih cam m0ntot labah² ,.,.eii geli geleman la plak nak makan.,,.~

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:: laju ku laju,.,.~ ::



hape kejadah nye team hingusan nih leh menang plak 5 game stright..,.,.? ferari ngan mclaren dah cam keropok rota je di buat nye,.,. diorg nih minyak campur ngan dadah agak nye.. FIA, laksanakan tanggungjawab anda,.,.check diorg nih pat!!!!!!!!!!!!!,.,.~

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:: ini bukan somalia,.,.~ ::


wakfir : lapolah, nk makan tapi mls nk kuar mlm nih,.,.~

aku : dah, xyah mkn,.,.,.,~

wakfir : tp aku lapo.,,.,.~

aku : gi la mkn,..,bpe kali aku nk cakap,.,.~

wakfir : aku mkn ko je lah,.,.,. waaaaa.,.,~ <------------bukak mulut luas konon nk makan aku,.,.~

aku : wakakakaka,.,.ko nih klaka la wakfir <------ ketawa guling²,..,,~

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:: hiahhh.,amik ko,. ::



seb baik je ko nih mr.cheng.,.,klu ko nih Goku agak dah rentung dah budak tu.,,. silap2 jadi debu,..,~

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:: sok cuti lagi,.,~::



xde ape yg menyakit kan ati aku mlm2 minggu nih,..,., tak laen, ntah anak2 sape ntah terlepas kt bawah nih, huha sane huha sini,.., maw je aku lastik seko2 budak nih,,.,. tp kan, klu aku culik diorg nih, mintak tebusan selion@sejuta kat mak bapak diorg agak2 berjaya x...? ngeeee,~

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:: hening pagi blues.,~ ::


jam komputer aku di tepi system tray tepat menunjuk kan pkl 2:35am,.,.,. sambil melayan mapiawor kt tagged, winamp penenaman dikala sunyi pagi,..,~ tp kan, ape kejadah nye winamp aku shuffle lagu raye tgh2 pagi buta nih,..,? hmmm.,,.,.syahdu gak ae.,.,., lyannnnnnnnnnn.,,.~

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:: IT'er VS ENGINE'er 3rd attemp ::


sambil membace satu artikel di site tomshardware.com tangan aku rancak ber"maen" slider pada disket, tindakan luar kawal maksud nye ,.,..,~

"ketuk²" pintu bilik opis aku di ketuk,.,.~

"ye, ade ape yg bley saye bantu...?" jawab aku skema, smbl tgn masih rancak bermaen slider disket,.

"mr.**ryzx, nnt u tlg check kan pc I ye, selalu shutdown ttbe" adu engineer pompuan nih.,,.

"ok, nnt I check ye, pastu tlg isi skali borng aduan,.,." smbil lewa aku mejawab,.,.~

"nnt u dtg tgk ae,,,.,.,.,..,eh, u maen bukak tutup slider tu xpe ke...?" sebok engineer pompuan tu

"why lah...?" aku blur seribu bahasa....~

"xde la, nnt klu u masuk kt komputer x kene virus ke..?" tye enginneer pompuan tu ngan muke yg bodo,.,.~

"????????????????,.,.,..,xpe, nt virus pc i power,.,..," jwb aku ngan perut yg keras smbil tidak mahu mendatang kan aib kepada beliau,.,,~

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:: jika itu buat ko riang,.,.~ ::


hotfm crew : trafik dilaporkan sesak di lebuhraya NPE bla bla bla,.,.,.,.~

aku : ahhh sia***lah, jem plak NPE, aku kne smp awl arini kt opis,.,.

ted : ko naek moto, bukan naek kete kebal,.,.,.~

aku : huh,.,.,.,. ko nih kan, klu sehari x memangkah aku, x lengkap kot id0p ko,.,.~ 

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:: pizza kan lagi sedap..~ ;:



malam nih sngguh b0san,..,entah lah, semenjak dua ni aku rase sungguh kosong.,., so, mr.google merupakan salah satu teman baik ku,..,.,~ so, minda aku secara rand0m memilih satu perkataan untuk aku taep di google.,.,.,~ "siput babi".,,.ya siput babi, aku pon xtau kenapa prasa itu yg dipilih secara rawak oleh minda aku,..,mungkin kerana byk sgt berita pasal "babi" kot skang nih.,.,,

kemudian nye aku menekan butang search,,.,. cube teka apa yg berjaya di "query".,.,~ mcm2 la hasil gelintaran yg keluar.,., tp salah satu hasil gelintaran yg wat aku berbisik "WTF..?" antaranya :-

1. Hukum Makan Siput Babi..?

pastu aku search image utk "siput babi".,,~
semakin ghairah prasa itu keluar,..,antara nye,.,.:-

1. berkaitan hukum makan Siput Babi
2.
bolehkah kita makan siput babi?
3.
Siput babi bleh makan ke?
4.
Siput babi.... Tasted better than I have expected.

adehhh.,.,dah xde mende laen ke nk makan,.,.,..,~



" siput babi masak ape ntah "

" siput babi sour "

" sup babi siput babi "

p/s : credit to image owner

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:: kuat zahir dan batin.,.,~ ::


aku : badan aku cepat lesu arr skang..,,.~

Ted : tu la, aku pon,.,.,~

aku : nk mkn ape ae bagi cergas sket...?

TEd : biawak.,,.~

aku : laZat gak tu,..,,.~

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:: ketenangan abadi..,.~ ::


orang kate maen game utk release tensi0n.,.,.,~
tp aku tgk member aku maen game, lagi byk sumpah seranah dan carutan segala kuar,.,.~ sape cakp maen game tenang? sape sape sape..?

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:: hari ku indah.,.,.,~ ::


kisah suatu petang yg shahdu.,.,.,.,~

"zZzzzzZZzzzZzz.,." td0o petang time2 cuti mmg syok,.,.,~

"suatu hari nanteeeeeeee, pasteeee kan bercahayeeeeeeee...."

"opocot mak kau maen golf"

"pentu akan terb0kaaaaaaaaaaaa...."

"ya Allah, sape plak la karoke ptg² camnih, sore cam haram.,.,~
nk wat nyanyi2 kenduri kawen wat je la, pggl la awie ka, amy search ka, rabbani ka.,,hilang mood aku mimpi cem0lot ngan agelina jolie,.,"

nota di kaki : aku xpenah dgr org karoke sore worst cam haram.,,.dah la speakr tala umah aku,.,. spoil cuti aku minggu nih.,.,

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